I'm baaaaack..

Hey there. So, after a long break - from blogging and dating - I thought I'd try both again. I'm not going to make some claim like I'll go on 30 dates in 30 days, or go out with every guy who asks. Those just aren't realistic. Considering I'm a busy gal and judgmental. But I'm going to try my darndest to be as open minded as I can.. And it sure won't be easy.

Within an hour of signing up, some dude 'chats' me. Typical jew-look - but seemingly funny. Ugh, why is this so challenging? Why is it so hard for me to choose to make decisions that will lead me to a life (I'm pretty sure) I want?

Seriously - why?

Heyo!

So, blog world, can anyone tell me why 'love' and 'respect' don't always go hand-in-hand? As in I still have those 'L' feelings, no pun intended, yet no respect at all. How is that possible? The feminists who have taught me along the way - and who I've read en route - have told me that you can't love if you don't respect. Hmmm.. is this about oneself or others? Or all the above? So how can you love someone you don't respect? And if you love someone you don't respect, how can you respect yourself? All valid questions, I'm afraid. And I'm also afraid of any answers that might be out there. So keep them to yourselves :-) Part of the process is knowing when you're not ready to hear the for-real truth.

Either way, when I'm on the bus and we pass 'his' street (aka street with his name in it) and someone pulls the cord to stop I still want to yell out 'Trust me, sister, you don't want this stop!' Yet.. a part of me still does? Or just thinks I do? Or upon consumption of adult beverages only remembers the good things and needs to remind myself of all the bad? Shouldn't it be the other way around? Have ALL those bad memories and actions and behaviors that made up the majority of whatever we had front of mind, and the good ones that were so few and far between way at the back? Why, oh why, adult beverages, do you reverse those? It's not a magic trick I like. Nor appreciate.

F you adult beverages. F you street. F you him. Slash.. I do still remember his number (from deleting it and re-entering it in my phone so many times) and want to text. But WON'T. Self-control, you little vixen. You are someone I can both love and respect.

Carfax for guys!

It just dawned on me, this is what we need! Screw asking them directly (they'd lie.. bitter/jaded - party of 1..) - or even Googling. Let's kick it up. I think I once heard about a site, or maybe it was a dream, where exes can record all aspects of the guy they dated. So others could learn from their mistakes - and misjudgments. It's only fair and should be expected to be looking out for each other. Just imagine what kind of fully informed decisions Kat Von D, Angelina or K.Holmes could have made given the proper tool.. ;-)

All that being said, I'm now going to actually ante up and pay for match.dot.c-o-m. I don't think I'll commit to going out with everyone who expresses interest (not that I'm saying I'll be getting my e-door knocked down) but I will try to be more open.. try, I said!

Stay tuned - and/or let me know of specific match-ers that I should steer clear of :-)

Craigslist Missed Connections - a more subtle version of 'Hey, Boy, Hey!'

So yes, I've posted on Missed Connections twice in my life. I guess the success of the first experience made me think the second would go as well. The first time I posted was spring of 2006. After my first softball game with UMD I ventured to the good ol' BL. And there, across the bar made eye contact with a handsome, familiar-looking guy.. We didn't get to talk but I felt a connection (those who know me now might be surprised to know I wasn't always a cynic :-P). The next day I was emailing with a friend about the evening and we both had recently become obsessed with Missed Connections - so she suggested I post. After a bit of hesitation I did. A couple of hours later, I received an email from a guy saying a friend of his saw the post and thought it was about him. We emailed for a bit and then met up for a date - and what do you know, it was him! And we had a blast. Let's call him Jesse (as in Jesse Martin, Law & Order). Jesse and I dated for a bit and then decided it would be best to be friends. And still, four years later, he's one of my best guy friends :-)

Since moving into the city, my new route to work entails a crowded bus. Often with cute hipsters (who I'd end up fighting #2 for) to make the trip more pleasant. So one morning the other week when I was in a good mood and running a tad late for work, I was able to grab a seat. And at some point glanced up to see an adorable albeit somewhat crunchy guy standing near me. His cords.. glasses.. eyes.. tat.. What a happy coincidence that he got off at my stop :-) As I walked behind him, I put together a little ode:
Between your cords and your blue checkered button-down, I could ride this bus with you all over town. Your glasses, blue eyes, beard and tat, for you I'd definitely go to bat. You appear to work at _____________ to boot, together I think we'd have a hoot. I might post this on Missed Connections soon, hopefully you're not a loon.

I received two responses - one from a random reader with the title 'Good Odin' that read: "All "missed connections" should be written like this. Nice post." And then another email from someone who said they were who I was speaking of:
"poet,
Ha, that's incredibly cute. I'm blushing!
Yes, I do work at ______________.
I am at a disadvantage, though, as you know exactly who I am and
haven't even a clue as to who you are.
write me back.
if not, thanks for brightening my day."

So I responded with some chit-chat and then inquired about the tat - because I couldn't quite make it out, and to be sure it was him. And then.. no..response.. So, either it was not him or he googled me and he's not interested. Either way, no skin off my nose. Though I bet he watches his back when riding the bus now ;-)

Here we go, here we go now!

Hi there..

Well, here's my first attempt at a blogpost. And off the bat, I think I spelled that wrong. Bodes well.. I usually think these things are pretty obnoxious as far as someone thinking everyone actually wants to know (and cares) about what's going on with them - as though they are important or relevant or something. But I've seen several that are just entertaining, amusing and relate-able so I thought why not. Especially now that I posted a 'match' profile. Let the winking begin!

Here's to my stories (hopefully I have some) being witty and comical - or at least absurd and a distraction to the dullness that is your life :-) Just kidding..

Cheers,
Bekah